Table of contents
Introduction
Chapter One
Question Everything and
Find a Better Way
To Do Anything
Chapter Two
What Do You Want Most?
Chapter Three
Be Nice No Matter What
Chapter Four
It’s The Tough
Things That Teach You
Chapter Five
If You Don’t Like
What You’re Doing, So What?
Chapter Six
Seek Improvement Everywhere
and In All Things
Chapter Seven
Stand Out From The Crowd
Chapter Eight
Take People With
You On Your Journey
Chapter Nine
Work-Life Balance
Chapter Ten
If You’re Going To Do Anything,
Do It All The Way
Chapter Eleven
Give Back To Everyone You Can
Chapter Twelve
Heal Yourself With Your Mind
Conclusion
Chapter Three
Be Nice No Matter What
This seems like a simple concept you wouldn’t have to write a chapter about, doesn’t it? Why would I have to expand on the concept of being nice? Well, it sounds simple, but being nice can sometimes be challenging.
I had a client leave me a message one morning, and when I called him back some minutes later, he was mad at me because I didn’t take his call, and he was happy to tell me that. But I’ve known this client for a while, and I explained that I had been on another call. I apologized but told him he had me now, and we could move forward and get his questions answered. He said he was sorry for getting so angry, but was concerned that the advertisement he was ordering from me would cost a lot of money. He was worried about losing his house and his wife if he didn’t start making money. That moment was real and emotional, and I understood that he was upset, but I knew then that he wasn’t upset with me. He was just upset at his current situation.
I talked with him for a few minutes, and once I settled him down, we moved on to talking about the advertisement that I would be preparing for him. He did end up having success, but it was likely due to his determination rather than anything I did on his mailing campaign. This man was a thoughtful, caring person, a nice, gentle soul, but money had him so stressed out that he said things he normally wouldn’t. And that is often the case with people—if something is going on, whether a health issue or a money issue, they take it out on those around them.
There have been several times in the business that I’ve been running for thirty-three years now that I had more bills than I had money. And yes, it created stress for me, but I always focused on what we needed to do to fix the problem rather than dwelling on it or saying, “Poor me.” I asked myself, Now what do we do? If we need more revenue, how can we create it? Can we make more phone calls? Maybe create a new mailer to give me a reason to call all my clients?
I found it better to be nice to my vendors and tell them the truth about my situation. In my experience, most people are not nice in these situations, and I’m not sure I blame them for that, but it often ends badly for them and doesn’t help them get to where they want to be in life. I would rather be nice and save the relationship, whether it’s personal or business. Who knows where this person will end up? They might end up working for me or vice versa. They might turn out to be a good friend you can talk to about life and business.
Being nice can be difficult when you encounter people who are not built the same way as you are. They may embrace the fact that they’re not nice or simply not realize it. I often recognize this type of person and determine that it’s better to keep my answers short and to the point. In cases like this, I am completely honest and professional in my responses, and I make sure to get paid for the job before I mail it.
Some people are just prone to having a bad day. Sometimes, the challenges of everyday life can weigh on people so much that they carry them around with them, and they can sometimes be rude to you. They complain to you or take it out on you. Imagine if, instead of getting emotional, you didn’t push back. Instead of fighting back, you simply said, “Oh no, that’s terrible,” or “I’m sorry that happened to you.”
I have seen this done many times by one of the most sympathetic people I know. Wendy was my assistant for years, but she eventually became a salesperson and now runs the sales and customer service department. She is responsible for more people at Lead Concepts than anyone else in the building. She taught me this, and although I can’t possibly do it as well as she can, I certainly aspire to it. Wendy has a way of taking your bad mood or rude behavior and somehow absorbing it so you don’t have it anymore. When you leave her office, you feel better because you left your issue or complaint behind. It took me some time to realize why everyone, including me, always wanted to talk to Wendy about their challenges. She simply accepted them and made you realize it was okay to feel that way without ever saying those words.
Being nice means taking a deep breath and realizing that, in most cases, people wake up every morning intending to do the best they can with that day. But then, sometime during the day, something happens that pushes them off course. Like when you’re driving and someone speeds past you and maybe cuts you off, and you let that ruin your day. It’s a choice you’re making.
Some people deal with stress differently than others. I don’t know how you deal with it, but hopefully, you’ll take the time to think about it and consider the direction you’re going. If you have worries about something that hasn’t happened yet, keep in mind that it may never happen. I’ve always found that if I smile at someone or say something nice about their hair, shoes, or choice of dress for that day, it makes them feel good, and it always makes me feel good. But I think when you smile at someone, the hope is that they’ll smile at someone else later.
Surrounding myself with people who are mean or rude to each other is not something I want to do. I want to spend time with people who are positive, people who are upbeat, people who are looking to the future, and people who speak nicely to each other. I think when you spend time with people who speak in a nasty way, you have to be careful because it might rub off on you a little bit. You have to choose the people that you’re going to be in the room with and be nice no matter what. This means giving people grace to be who they are. Don’t expect them to be the same as you. Some people will see the world in a completely different way than you do. My big brother Bill and I tend to see the world very differently. When he worked with me, I could always count on him to see things I didn’t see. My brother is one of the nicest business people I know—he roots for everyone to be successful, and he will do anything he can to help you succeed, even if it’s not in his best interest.
Being nice seems unnecessary until you start breaking down just how hard it can sometimes be to deal with rude or unreasonable people in business or in general. I can tell you that being nice is worth it and has served me well over many years. Be friendly but professional. I hope you find your balance.
Table of contents
Introduction
Chapter One
Question Everything and
Find a Better Way
To Do Anything
Chapter Two
What Do You Want Most?
Chapter Three
Be Nice No Matter What
Chapter Four
It’s The Tough
Things That Teach You
Chapter Five
If You Don’t Like
What You’re Doing, So What?
Chapter Six
Seek Improvement Everywhere
and In All Things
Chapter Seven
Stand Out From The Crowd
Chapter Eight
Take People With
You On Your Journey
Chapter Nine
Work-Life Balance
Chapter Ten
If You’re Going To Do Anything,
Do It All The Way
Chapter Eleven
Give Back To Everyone You Can
Chapter Twelve
Heal Yourself With Your Mind
Conclusion